Give Thanks

Well, since it's been a while from my latest post (i guess, i hvn't posted anything yet this month)
I remember i was desperately waiting for JUNE to come before..
n guess what, 10days passed already...
Time just runs fast...

Talking bout life and relationship between people,
it will be just and endless topic, as we know every person acts and thinks differently..
And these days, i just got my eyes opened about what've happened in the past..
Being greatful is just what i can do now...

A friend of mine, Mr.J asked me.. "why are u still single? is it because guys find you as a "too independent" gal?"
and i just naturally answered "yes, they do" and they even complained that they are "useless" for me...
Alright, lemme tell u, guys...
It's not the matter of being too independent or tough...
but it's all the matter of how do you see it...
the world is just different from before, as well as the lifestyle...
i dun dare to be a gal who's just sitting waiting for her man to get everything for her...
HELL NO!! but, most of guys prefer those kinda gals, who can treat them as SUPERHERO...
and they are who i call as "JADUL GUYS".. =p
(oops, sorry.. i don't mean anything, i'm just expressing what i'm thinking about)
well, let them be... hahahaha... they have their own ways to live, then i have my own too...

A phrase from the song "Give Thanks", inspired me a lot whenever i try to think about this life...
it says "Let the weak say I'm strong, and let the poor say I'm rich"
what i can catch from that, simple... the title: GIVE THANKS for eveything u have...
Dun try to compare what u have with other if it's just letting u to a jealousy...
But, if comparing brings you spirit and hope for a better future, then i'll say it is ABSOLUTELY OK...

Mk, welcome home, mate... hahaha... hope u get a good break here...
call me if u hv time so we can talk and arrange meeting schedule... ^^
n HM... i'm counting down to pick u up at the airport... okie?? =p

Today's Quote: "Let your true colour shines... be proud of being youself.."

-Jezz

End of May...

I told some of my pals:
"last year (2008) was hard... the beginning of 2009 was the hardest part.... mid 2009, everything should be fine... and by the end of 2009, everything will be great..."
and here it is... June is coming, means it's mid year now.... (should i shout out loud "yayyyy"???)
i remember one of my friend told me when we're still in high school "time passes so fast when u're single..."
Thinking back bout that words, kinda true tho... It seems new year eve was just few days ago n now is almost June...
For everyone who's reading this, u might wonder why am i so excited about this mid year, June especially...
Yeah... it's the month i'm waiting for in this year... seriously, after things happened, i think June will be the rightest time to go out there, do crazy stuffs and have fun...
Coz my friends are coming... yayyyy.... do i need to mention???
alrite... here's the list... Dj, Mk, HM, Ls, Jt, Nd, etc....
Marking up my diary on which date they'll arrive... Lalalalala....
I should recover from the terrible flu before june... it's a MUST.... =p

What do i need to do next???
Keep walking on this life... ^^
"It's a long long journey... Till I know where I'm supposed to be...
it's a long long journey... And I don't know if I can believe...
When shadows fall and block my eyes...
I'm lost and know that I must hide...
It's a long long journey...
Till I find my way home to You... "
(Journey - Angela Zhang)


Photograph by Ian Hudiono; Location: Glenferrie Station, Melbourne. 2007.


Ir... who's busy with her archicad... well, good luck mate...
just few weeks to go... then u'll be free...
I'm counting down for your 21st anyway... (plz dun blame me for not knowing ur bday anymore)
thking what should i get u for present... Lalalala....
Mk... Just talked to u few days ago... and now i'm listening to all the songs we recorded...
LOL... i'll see u soon at Jkt, mate... =p
(dun forget my "titipan" anyway...)
Anw, I think it's enough for today... hungry and get to cook sumthing for dinner...
Today's Quote:
"Love the ones you have..."

-Jezz

Three Months...

I went to office this morning with swollen eyes...
n here I'm, feeling extremely sleepy...
i just wanna spend some minutes writing my blog here, just few minutes... i promise...
coz heaps of works are waiting to be done...

Well... today is exactly 3months after that day...
n I dunno what happened to my self last mid nite, that i cried out loud...
Yea... i always wished to cry out loud once as the end of my previous "love story"...
i tried to cry since last month, but i just couldn't...
then last nite, tears were just dropping from my eyes automatically...
n i feel so much better, after this 3 months, finally i could express what i feel inside...
(thx to Hb for being there listening to me)

to all my friends...
Ir, Av, Al, Dj, Mk, Hb, Dn, HM and many others who can't be mentioned one by one...
Thank you for all ur supports to me... i love you all, guys... ^^
to my beloved Bros... Wm n Wn...
who always care bout me and ask me out for sumthing fun whenever i stressed out...

after all, i should stop typing this blog... (reports are Qing... T___T )
so.. as my previous post said,
i just wanna live my life and be happy while i can....

Today's quote:
"Leave out all the rest... then FOCUS..."

-Jezz

Priorities....

Finally i can have a relaxing weekend...
Last 2 weeks were seriously busy and restless... haiz...
But, i just hate the time when i hv nothing to do, many kinds of though are coming to my mind...

I spent last nite talking to Hb bout what i feel these days...
n guess what, he does feel the same with me...
When people judge you from outside, without knowing how we are, they will just think that our lives are just easier then theirs...
What are they looking at are just our performances, careers, and achievements...
then they say to you "lucky you bla bla bla...." or some other similar phrases...
I'm just wondering don't they know how could things happen behind the screen....
n i feel like shouting to them loudly, "being me isn't just easy as u think!!!!"
(Five for Fighting, Superman lyrics: "it's not easy to be me...")

Pissing of... Seriously... (no names to be mentioned here)
Could you just please give me some spaces for my self n plzzzz... plzz stop stalking me like that...
I can't just spend all my time talking such unimportant stuffs to you...
Well, i have my own things to do and my own friends to talk to...
n i did mention to you, that THEY ARE MORE IMPORTANT... n they are all my priorities...
i even mentioned their names to you... *sigh....

Dj, finally u finish ur internship... lol... i thk i will be lonely staying in my cubicle during weekdays...
hahaha... but, gd on ya... u dun need to feel that bored anymore...
Anw, talking bout "paret" and life....... kinda speechless this time...
even u ask me why, u know that i dun get any answer for that...

Ir... who's busy with her 3d cad while i'm typing this... i can't wait for you to be here...
pls dun be jealous that i'm not "CAD-ing" anymore... lol
I thk Av will drag me to do his cad drawing when he's rushing everything...

HM, melbourne mue... LOL... i'm waiting for you to arrive indo... surely will pick u up at the airport mate.... ^^ dun forget my UNO flash.... =p

Al... Dj asked me to go and visit u there together... how does it sound?? =p
enjoy your break mate... ^^ n pls go back indo for next break... wakakakaka....
or either provide air ticket for me n dj to visit u... lalalalala...

at last for today...
i only have a simple wish...
i just wanna enjoy my life and be happy while i can... i'm living for today and every new days i get... "it's my life, it's now or never... I ain't gonna live forever, i just wanna live while i'm alive..."
(It's My Life by Bon Jovi)

Today's quote: "Live as u will die tomorrow and dream as u will live forever..."

-Jezz

Wondering....

when time passes so fast, i dun feel that i really have time for myself...
yeah... spending Mon-Fri in office (8 to 5, or even later)...
then just have 2 days off in weekend...

Wondering... is this something that i really wish to do???
Life seems monotone once i start working... (Hb told me so..)
sometimes i just dunno why am i doing this n that... why must i be like this n that...
why... why... why bla bla bla... (never ending questions)...
sigh*....

Wondering about someone... (I never wished to think bout you... but... sigh*....)
I'm not supposed to think or feel this way...
But Av just told me "you need sum1 to take care of you..."
Do I???? i even dunno n doubt bout that...
but, u do know me really well, Av...
but doesn't mean I need sum1 to take care of me, maybe sum1 I can trust, sum1 i can rely on...
(the one i never found... lol)
Almost the same condition like all of you guys, Al, Dj n Ir...
We laugh, we talk, we're doing good, bla bla bla...
n we're just PRETENDING that WE'RE FINE... (Another sigh*)

Wondering bout your words, Av...
"FORGIVE & FORGET"..
i know that's what i supposed to do... but.. but...
it's not as easy as it is spoken... T___T
but, i surely can do that... it just takes time...

Wondering to move out sumwhere else...
Thinking bout China as the next stop... hahaha... how would it be???

At the end, I'm just tired for everything happened in my life...
n still... keep wondering this n that...

Today's quote: "sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand...
And what you've been out there searching for forever is in your hands..."

- Jezz

Easter Sunday Morning...

Happy easter everyone...
Easter is the time for everyone to re-born and start to walk on this life in a better way... ^^

As the time passes, i feel much much better since before now.. (i mean, since the day i went back to Melbourne and packed my stuffs)...
Thanks to all my friend...
Specially to Ir, Al and Av... who're always there to listen to me...
and others... who spent their time with me...
Rk, Jp, and Ew... my church mates... who always argue with me bout where to go for lunch... LOL...
Dj... the one who's always on MSN with me during office hours...
Dn... the one who's on the phone with me during traffic jam...
Hb... a great singer who sings before i sleep... the one who always worries bout me...
Nd... sum1 who said that "crying is not cool"... =p
Ls and At... i never thought of being close to you guys, but, it's just fun to talk with you...
Mk... the one who never packed his lunch anymore since i left... hahaha...
Bn... my childhood friend who always makes me laugh...
too many to mention.. T____T

Friendship...
the relationship between people i appriciate the most...
What i see now... friends... will always be friends...
no matter how far away we're seperated... we're still in touch...
still sharing with each others...
and in this easter sunday, i wanna thank God... for giving me all these OWESOME friends...
I should learn to spend more time with them, like i never done before coz of my selfishness...
sumtimes, i'm not a good friend as well... but now, i'm trying to be...
coz i dun wanna lose all these precious people in my life...
You're all irreplaceable... n I love you all, guys... ^^

Today's Quote: "You and I will always be... celebrating life together...
I know I've found friends forever more..."

-Jezz

a story about bird poo...

I seriously have a lot of things to type, but my mind is just too messy that i couldn't think well...
Where should i start... LOL...

This's my 4th week of working... how do i find it?? so so... kinda boring tho...
keep doing the same thing everyday... then now i can appreciate my weekend well... hahaha...
Went out with high school friends and talked...
n just realized.. how different the way we think and act now compared with before (years ago when we're all still in high school)..

Dn told me a story...
When u plan to go out and at the time u just walk out the house, a bird poo on u...
then, what will you do???
I bet, everyone will have this answer...
"go back into the house, do some cleaning and go out again..."
if we apply that simple story to this real life... it would be like this..
the bird poo is the same with troubles or any difficulties in this life...
going into the bathroom and clean yourself mean look back at what've happened and learn from mistakes we've done... it does take sometimes to think then realize and learn... but, no matter how long it takes, it works if you brave enough to try...
Go out from the house means we're ready to face all the new thing in front of us...
Life is like that... we'll never know how bad or how good we are if troubles never came..

Ir, i'm desperately waiting for you to come back Indo.. then we start to set up our business plan.. LOL... my mom just asked me bout going to Beijing this afternoon, i forgot to tell u before... was too busy with those shitty reports in the office... just remind me that when we talk in msn... =)

Al, i read a passage written for me... "dun be too tough, overall u're just a girl"...
LOL.. i am a girl.. but, what i'm facing now is even making me tougher than before.. so, any help???
gud luck with all ur stuff there.. especially HW... Gambatte ne...

Dj, seems long2 time since latest time we talked b4... hahaha... n we do talk a lot now, coz of this "perasaan senasib"... boring office hours... hahaha... but, i enjoy talking to u as i did since high school... how long will it take to leave that office?? 20+ days rite?? well, gud luck too.. haha... I'll be on msn with you during those shitty times... =p

Av, dun think u will read my blog unless if i read it out for you... (wondering if ur internet is really working or not)... well, i think we got a lot of things to discuss... later, if we both have time... Let's go sumwhere for refreshing.... i'm seriously sick of this monotone days... think we both need some time to do crazy stuffs out there... =p and ask others to join too...

Mk, where're my requests??? hahaha... Gud luck with assignments... LOL... i feel like going to safeway and do crazy grocery shopping like what i used to do when i was in melb... =p

That's all for tonight... I'm too tired to type although i still hv a lot of words in my mind...
i'll just continue when i have time...

Today's quote: "容易得到的东西也容易失去。。"
means: easy come easy go...

-Jezz